You'd think...
I never thought I would be referring to this, but you know that scene, from Family Guy?
That scene used to be hilarious for me… until it became my everyday life. And I am not even referring to being a mom! Lately I feel like too many people have become overly dependent on me, both in my personal life and at the office. And, as their needs grow exponentially I am plain and simply becoming tapped out! I have needs too! And right now I honestly just need to NOT be needed for a while!
Without getting into depth about my job, let’s just say that I am part of a team of people who support thousands of clients every day, and approximately 1300 of them are more specifically assigned to me. And, the majority of these clients are “Millennials”... a generation I truly have difficulty relating to! Now, while I am not solely responsible for each and every one of them, lately it really does feel that way. My main support system has literally “left the building” as he has taken a different job in seemingly greener pastures. Yay for him (seriously, not sarcastically)! My confidence in those who have been left behind? Undeniably wavering, day after day. Honestly, my ability to do my job, one that I have loved for so many years, remains unchanged. But, my desire to do it… that is what’s changing. Call it a midlife career crisis I guess.
And then there are my so-called friends; those who want our company and those who come to me for advice, a shoulder to cry on, or just for sympathy because “I must understand”. Here’s the thing… I totally get the mom-tribe and I fully support the mom-tribe, but sometimes I think, maybe, some of you are barking up the wrong tree!
One complains that she never sees us anymore, but any time I try and suggest something she has other plans or turns us down for a better offer. Feeling the love? And while she is still on maternity leave, I work so my hours are limited. It’s not like I just came back to work either, it’s been over a year and a half! It’s not a surprise! So, while I may text back all nice, sweet, and understanding… I am truly over it and, FYI, I won’t be asking her anymore either. You truly miss us and want to hang out? Call me!
The other comes to me looking for sympathy because her husband goes out once a week to play sports with his friends, leaving her and her school aged children to fend for themselves for the evening. Sure, mine leaves the LO and I home for days, sometimes weeks, at a time! Obviously I totally understand what it feels like to be completely alone for a few hours, I mean, it’s just a moment! No? I mean, it’s not like he up and leaves you for days! Yeah, you see what just happened there, right? You’d think that I might be sympathetic, but I’m really not... I kind of envy you and may harbour a little resentment towards you too.
Another one comes looking for a shoulder to cry on because she got pregnant with her first child on the very first try and now she has been TTC for 3 months and it just isn’t happening! Insert whine here. After a decade of trying, I hardly remember how I felt after just 3 months! But I do remember how I felt after 3 years… 3 IUI’s… 2 rounds of IVM… and 2 rounds of IVF. I am sure that after seeing me go through all of that for a decade you’d think that I would be the first one to jump in and cheer you on and cheer you up, but really, I am slightly jealous. Not because you are “suffering” now, but because you are truly naïve to the hurt and turmoil that I and so many others have had to endure battling infertility. And, I pray you are never the wiser.
And then there are the moms who I have relied on for so long, that I love with all my heart and feel indebted to. MY TRIBE! Those are the moms I want to give my energy to; the ones battling demons of their own, the ones who are truly struggling to balance life and parenting, the ones facing medical battles bigger than anything we have ever had to face ourselves. I want to be there for these women, and their children, with all that I can. And, for them and for myself, I need all of the other BS to clear the path and stop sucking the life out of me!
Stewie Griffin: Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mama! Mama! Mama! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mummy! Mummy! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!
Lois Griffin: WHAT?!
Stewie Griffin: Hi. [Runs off giggling]
That scene used to be hilarious for me… until it became my everyday life. And I am not even referring to being a mom! Lately I feel like too many people have become overly dependent on me, both in my personal life and at the office. And, as their needs grow exponentially I am plain and simply becoming tapped out! I have needs too! And right now I honestly just need to NOT be needed for a while!
Without getting into depth about my job, let’s just say that I am part of a team of people who support thousands of clients every day, and approximately 1300 of them are more specifically assigned to me. And, the majority of these clients are “Millennials”... a generation I truly have difficulty relating to! Now, while I am not solely responsible for each and every one of them, lately it really does feel that way. My main support system has literally “left the building” as he has taken a different job in seemingly greener pastures. Yay for him (seriously, not sarcastically)! My confidence in those who have been left behind? Undeniably wavering, day after day. Honestly, my ability to do my job, one that I have loved for so many years, remains unchanged. But, my desire to do it… that is what’s changing. Call it a midlife career crisis I guess.
And then there are my so-called friends; those who want our company and those who come to me for advice, a shoulder to cry on, or just for sympathy because “I must understand”. Here’s the thing… I totally get the mom-tribe and I fully support the mom-tribe, but sometimes I think, maybe, some of you are barking up the wrong tree!
One complains that she never sees us anymore, but any time I try and suggest something she has other plans or turns us down for a better offer. Feeling the love? And while she is still on maternity leave, I work so my hours are limited. It’s not like I just came back to work either, it’s been over a year and a half! It’s not a surprise! So, while I may text back all nice, sweet, and understanding… I am truly over it and, FYI, I won’t be asking her anymore either. You truly miss us and want to hang out? Call me!
The other comes to me looking for sympathy because her husband goes out once a week to play sports with his friends, leaving her and her school aged children to fend for themselves for the evening. Sure, mine leaves the LO and I home for days, sometimes weeks, at a time! Obviously I totally understand what it feels like to be completely alone for a few hours, I mean, it’s just a moment! No? I mean, it’s not like he up and leaves you for days! Yeah, you see what just happened there, right? You’d think that I might be sympathetic, but I’m really not... I kind of envy you and may harbour a little resentment towards you too.
Another one comes looking for a shoulder to cry on because she got pregnant with her first child on the very first try and now she has been TTC for 3 months and it just isn’t happening! Insert whine here. After a decade of trying, I hardly remember how I felt after just 3 months! But I do remember how I felt after 3 years… 3 IUI’s… 2 rounds of IVM… and 2 rounds of IVF. I am sure that after seeing me go through all of that for a decade you’d think that I would be the first one to jump in and cheer you on and cheer you up, but really, I am slightly jealous. Not because you are “suffering” now, but because you are truly naïve to the hurt and turmoil that I and so many others have had to endure battling infertility. And, I pray you are never the wiser.
And then there are the moms who I have relied on for so long, that I love with all my heart and feel indebted to. MY TRIBE! Those are the moms I want to give my energy to; the ones battling demons of their own, the ones who are truly struggling to balance life and parenting, the ones facing medical battles bigger than anything we have ever had to face ourselves. I want to be there for these women, and their children, with all that I can. And, for them and for myself, I need all of the other BS to clear the path and stop sucking the life out of me!
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